THANKS FOR THE SNOW, MARCH.

That's exactly what I wanted after the awesome weather we had last week. 

That's just a fucking dream that is.

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The irony is that I started writing this before I realised I was late to go out to dinner, and on my way home from dinner I fell over and now I can't really walk/sit down/function as a proper human being.
Well played snow, you win this round.
The worst part is that if I manage to sit in a position that's comfortable the pain kind of goes away, and then I forget why I'm so bed-ridden in the first place and I try to get up and do something and...well there's a lot of swearing going on after that put it that way. I also keep throwing my phone casually onto the bed and realising I can't bend down to pick it up. So I have to do a weird kneel-then-roll kind of movement and my life is just a series of ridiculous movements at the moment.
There's also a really attractive lump on the back of my head.
Only I could possibly injure myself so severely from slipping over in the street.

And although I'm obviously eternally grateful for the people who stopped to ask if I was okay...they were probably a bit too quick to try and call me an ambulance.
I think proportionality here is key. Yes, I was in a lot of pain, but I sat up almost straight away and I only really wanted to stay sat down because I'd just travelled a 1.65m downwards in about half a second, so I was confused. I wasn't sure what I was doing on the ground to be honest. It's not like I'd been shot.

In all fairness even if I had been shot I'd probably still get up and persist that I was fine. I find talking to strangers pretty awkward at the best of times, so if I'm going to be writhing in pain, I want someone I know to watch me do it. 

And now I'm doing weird things to protect myself from further pain, like physically stopping people who are trying to pass me in shops and moving away in case they accidentally brush against me and cause me to burst into tears. I'm giving no explanation to these weird gestures though, so I either look overtly polite or like I have serious social anxiety problems.

This hasn't been that interesting and I apologise, but if there's one thing being in constant pain does not make me want to do, it's write. Or anything at all for that matter.

Au revoir.
xx

Last week was not my friend.

Last week left my questioning my decision to move house.

First I was greeted by a hole outside my door (actually my whole street was a hole), and apparently no one felt the need to put any sort of bridge between my door and the part of the road that was still intact. Also apparently it's completely acceptable to ask the person who lives on one side of the hole you just dug to 'jump' to the other side.
Good thing I'm a part-time acrobat.
Good thing I don't wear a pencil skirt to work.
Good thing that I'm not the most likely person to fall into a hole in the ground, IN THE WORLD.

I also forgot my phone that day so I had to go back, and apparently 'you're here a lot aren't you' is an acceptable thing to say to someone who's front door you're digging around. I'm here a lot? This isn't a bar, I live here! What are you doing here? How can you be standing 2 feet from my doorway all day and think it's noteworthy that I come here a lot?

Then I went out on Friday night and got in at 4am and was woken at 9am by what I could only describe as a small fair. Like with cheery music and shit. I've yet to work out exactly where in Brussels this could have been held, but I didn't appreciate it.

Also every time the kettle boils I think it's someone hoovering. Every. Single. Time. Even though the kettle is in my room and I will have switched it on 5 minutes prior to the noise, it always takes me a little bit of time to work out where that noise is coming from.

AND my phone isn't loud enough for me to hear it when I'm outside, but it's so loud that whenever it goes off when I'm at home, I have a little heart attack.
So loud that I smashed a glass in the sink in surprise the last time someone text me.
Because I dropped it - I don't just break glasses when I'm surprised.
That would be an inconvenient reaction to surprise.

That's probably enough complaining for now.
 Apart from having my life ruined by inanimate objects nothing has really happened, but everything's pretty good. So last week wasn't so bad I guess.

If you change the 'e' in pixelated to an 'i' to make it pixilated, then it means to be led astray by pixies. 
Best (incredibly common) typo ever. 

 I just couldn't not share this with you, she is so talented.

xx