10 things I've learnt about travelling

 /people who travel/I spend too much time on modes of transport.

1. Your luggage probably doesn't come with a neon sign attached to it, so sometimes people won't see it and will walk into it, this is your fault. 

2. Also sometimes if you don't come with a neon sign attached to you and you're small enough to be looked over, people will walk into you, this is also your fault. 

3. Seats on any form of transport are measured using tiny children, because there is no way even a small adult would have given the okay to seats that size. 

4. Seat reservations are to be taken seriously, and if you've had the impertinence to misread your ticket and sit in the wrong place you deserve to be publicly shamed through a collection of excessively loud declarations of your error and exasperated sighs as you get ready to move. 

5. Some people will crave human contact so badly they will sit next to you even if there is plenty of other space available.

6. Travel is the time to live your dreams. People who sit behind appear me appear to have dreamt of playing percussion (read as: you are not Keith Moon; stop tapping on my chair).

7. If you're carrying a hiking rucksack as opposed to a suitcase, you are obviously a student or on your gap year, and therefore less worthy of the respect or courtesy of everyone around you. 

8. Most children will be quiet most of the time, on the occasion they dare to make noise it is customary to exchange pained glances with everyone around you. 

9. Sometimes all the stars and planets align and you get two seats to yourself  for a whole journey-this is impossible to enjoy at the time however, due to the fear that will grip you at every station that someone might get on and sit down.

10. 99% of the time, everyone has a pretty firm grasp of social convention and knows exactly when it is a appropriate to make conversation and when it is not. That 1% is the worst 2 hours of your life.

But I had a really nice Easter and now it's moving into double figure temperatures (that's right, people of Britain, it's cold in other places too) we can do things outside and I know I've been really bad at this recently but I'll try and get better I swear.

Until next time!
xx

I've stopped getting those 'WELCOME TO...' texts from my network when Icross a border.

Which is probably the biggest 'stop doing these ridiculous coach journeys' sign you can get, if my own phone company can't be bothered to acknowledge how much I'm moving around, then I should probably stop doing it. At least for a little while.

But yet this coach is always full, who is doing this journey from London to Brussels in the middle of November on a Sunday night? Apparently the answer to that is shit loads of people. And the guy sat next to me on the journey to London apparently found it acceptable to do a mini work out next to me. So many hours in the day and you couldn't just not do weird breathing exercises for those 2 hours? Really? But on a happier note London looks beautiful now all the lights are on, and I'm lucky enough to drive down the street with both the Harrods and Harvey Nichols Christmas windows on them, they're amazing.

I also met someone on the coach who said my accent made me sound intelligent, something I'm still trying to process to be honest.

And I need to find somewhere else to travel from, so I can stop being harassed in the train station. Just a heads up,  if I've told you I don't understand a word of French (lie) and from the little English you understand I've also managed to tell you I have a husband and a child (also lies). Then you need to step back, and stop hitting on me. Cheers. 10/10 for persistence though, I'm not saying you didn't try. Just that you didn't really realise when you'd failed.

So a quick update on my day, it would appear that I am ill, so today has so far been spent watching Alex Day read Twilight on Youtube. Now no one can attack me for saying I hate it and not having read it, because now I sort of have, at least in the sense of watching someone criticise it chapter by chapter. What got me in particular was that there seems to be a real interest into why Edward saves Bella from being hit by a car,; does that really need an explanation? Isn't that actually a pretty normal thing to do, would you really sit there and wonder what potential sinister motives they could have? Also apparently in Twilight it's totally okay to start talking about marrying someone when you've only known them for 2 weeks, and in the same conversation discuss how easily they could crush your skull. Don't even get me started on the 'forgot to breathe' thing when she faints.

Anyway, my weekend was awesome, it started off with a Post-Election Party, during which I watched a man who looked like an older Hugh Grant dance very well.

Dear whoever you are, I'm modelling my future husband on you.

It continued with a trip to Lydney to see Alex, who for some reason left her summer in Sydney to do winter in the South West of Britain, but I'm very glad she did. For some reason I've only taken about 4 photos from the past 2 weekends so I can't even show you what we did, something we did do is make sweet potato at like 10pm on Friday night. The lesson there is that watching too many cooking programmes set in the English countryside will give you irrational cravings. And then I went to Bath for half a day, and Bristol for about an hour and experienced my Uni life again and as a result was pretty sad to leave and come back to reality. But on the upside we've started house-hunting for final year. I'm still in that stage where I'm looking out houses I clearly can't afford, in other words, I'm looking for a house in Bath.

Here I am with Chepstow Castle.

I'm not one to absorb joy - Jon Richardson.

I know how you feel babe, I know how you feel.

xx