BEDIJ #28

This is actually the only photo I took yesterday - sorry Josh.

If pathetic fallacy was a thing; then this morning would have been it. Grey and cold and raining.  Absolutely miserable.  But I’m not going to talk about how I feel about leaving, because I promised Lizzy this wouldn’t be a sad post. Also because I think I might have had too little sleep and/or food to properly process any emotions right now. 

Sat in the café at Gare du Midi, there were a group of British people next to me with a television camera. This is the best networking opportunity I’ve had in the past 10 months (and I kind of just want to know what they’re doing), but considering I just spent the tram journey letting people clamber over my bags because I literally didn’t care if they accidentally hit me in the face, now probably isn’t my best time. 

So let’s think about why it’s good that I’m leaving. Ignoring the fact that I have to leave because I no longer have a room to rent or a job, I have to leave because I should and I need to.  This year has been amazing, everyone has been amazing, and I’m incredibly sad to be leaving it behind. Nevertheless, I’m never going to do anything else if I don’t leave, I won’t have a degree for starters so unless I want to spend my life as a perpetually unpaid intern, I’ll probably want to get that. 

I’m certainly never going to write better if I don’t experience change; eventually I’d just run out of things to say. The most exciting stories I’ll have will be of my journeys to and from Brussels to home, and quite frankly, if I keep doing journeys like this, I will be lucky if I don’t lose the ability to use my arms altogether. 

Also last night was amazing, and so much fun, and I'm going to miss everyone in Brussels a lot. 

That's the closest we're getting to a sad post, I promise. 

xx

 

BEDIJ #29

We're just going to have to imagine photo of the day today because I'm doing this on a phone I haven't fully worked out how to use yet...

My bag is heavy. I know how to pack lightly, and I know how to pack this bag, but no matter how hard I tried, it seemed nothing could prevent it from putting an amount of weight on my upper body that I’m just not built to carry. 

I’m so glad only my family are coming to meet me at the other end of this journey because I literally look disgusting. That’s not there to fish for compliments; I can just feel a look on my face that says I’m tired and miserable and even thinking about having a conversation is too draining for me. No one looks good like that. 

What times like this have taught me is that I’ve really got my own back. At first when I saw I had to walk a whole five carriages down the platform, I was disappointed in myself and my seating choice. But Past Claire had a plan, and as a result of her vigilance, I’m sat in the carriage next to the food carriage, I have a seat to myself and I’m next to the luggage rack. 

Present Claire however, finds it impossible to get on at the right end of the carriage any time she takes a train journey, so as a result her luggage is in the other set of luggage racks. 

It doesn’t matter though. I don’t need to be close to my luggage. I do need a cup of tea and yoghurt.

Present Claire also appears to have packed her bag slightly lopsided, so I’m hitting everything within a 4 inch radius of my left-hand side. Nice work Present Claire, nice work.

I then went on to have the most beautiful evening, hope you had a wonderful 21st Pippa! 

xx

BEDIJ #27

Final Place Lux Thursday ahhh. 

 

Okay, so I know I've been talking all week about how ready I am to leave and I've got so many plans to go home to. But now it's Friday and this time tomorrow I'll be nearly home and I just don't think I'm ready for that. I feel like I'm going to get home and just sit down and not know what to do with myself.

Yesterday I had my final Place Jourdan frites and my final Place Lux Thursday and I'm not entirely sure I'm ready to have done these things for the last time. And then I had to start saying goodbye to people and tonight is just going to be horrendous; I am not emotionally ready for all this shit.

So in conclusion, yesterday made me have a little break down, today will be worse. 

 

Tomorrow will actually be the worst because packing has not been the easy process I had expected and I am too small to carry all the things in my possession right now.

xx

BEDIJ #26

Look how beautiful Brussels is...nah just kidding, that is what it looks like though.

 So here's a quick run down of what I won't miss about Brussels

• The pavements. I just don't have very good brain-foot coordination so they're either dangerous because they're ridiculously uneven, or because they're so smooth that even the slightest bit of rain turns them into slippery death traps. 
• The roads. I just don't want to have to do passive aggressive 'thank-you-but-it's-my-right-of-way-so-not-really' hand gestures every time I cross the road any more. 
• The general lay out of the city. So I just don't understand, like I swear the roundabout there these buildings are leads to EVERYWHERE. I know it's a roundabout and that's what it's meant to do, but I feel like the city is not laid out in a logical manner and I still don't really understand where everything is; I've just memorised routes to get to the places I need to go to. Don't tell me to look at a map, just, you just don't understand. 
• My laptop. This isn't actually Brussels related, but being here is the reason I can't replace my current laptop. This isn't just some 'ahh it's so slow' complaint. This is an exposed wiring/the hinges of the screen has broken on one side/my screen tilts/the plastic covering the important bits of the screen is coming off - type situation.
• Sundays/shop opening times. Brussels, the person who designed your retail policy needs firing. This is literally a city of people who work 9-5 (usually more like 8-6)...why close all your shops at 6, and why have nothing open on a Sunday, and why are your supermarkets open so sporadically, and where are your cash machines!

Okay, I'm done. 

xx

BEDIJ #25

Video of the Day is slowly becoming a thing isn't it?
I've only got 3 days left here, and that's just crazy, where has my time gone? 
But I am also pretty excited to go home, these are the things I plan to do, in no particular order:

• Eat fish and chips
• Watch all of Green Wing/The Thick of It/Band of Brothers
• Read all the books on my list
• Watch all the documentaries on my list
• Stop getting up at 7.30am everyday
• Eat a full English breakfast
• Eat a roast dinner
• Eat some Cadbury's Dairy Milk
• Just go to the countryside and roll around in it for a while
• Go to the theatre 
• Watch PMQs (I'm not kidding, I miss BBC iPlayer)

But before that I need to pack and clean like my life depends on it.
xx